#1 29-11-11 07:16:35

aven frey

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If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Amen John Waters.

So, what books if any would make someone more sexually desirable if seen in said persons book collection, or spoken by said person, or recommended by said person.

I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours and then we can all get laid, woo!

p.s I couldn't fit in the ' in the don't in the subject header!

emily_c

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Registered: 24-02-11

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

hm.  i have a few pet things i tend to look out for - Philip Larkin, Borges, Perec, and mid 20th century Japanese writers.  if i see any of these, i'm super impressed.  but as long as they read fiction - a broad, intelligent, interesting quantity of fiction, and fiction that i want to talk about with them, i'm usually excited and interested and will want to know what they are passionate about in their collection.

i also look out for art books. 

it's also a good test to see how they react to the books on my shelf.  i'm more likely to judge based on that.

and oh, hai. i have been lurking for months now, but a book related post has tempted me out.

Xebeche

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

How funny.  I did recently have someone give me a backhanded insult on the contents of one of my bookshelves!  They err....haven't been invited back since.

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"I read Shakespeare and the Bible, and I can shoot dice. That's what I call a liberal education" - Tallulah Bankhead

blissed

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

bobby the book format isn't so appealing to me as it is to you. Great ideas are as long as they are. That can be a short piece. or a long one that needs to be a book or a video or any mixed media.  And for me that book will be downloaded. and downloaded it doesn't matter how long or short the ideas are.

I don't place how scholarly someone is above my affection for them. It's not so important what has influenced them just how that influence manifests itself in them and how they are. Though I might not fuck someone if they've got a treasured copy of Mein Kampf

P.S. Just thought there's a lot of moralising about affection, love and sex. So I think it's worth mentioning not everyone brings affection into wether they want to fuck someone and their criteria for fuckability is just as valid for them as mine is for me.

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Last edited by blissed (29-11-11 21:16:13)

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domC

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

I get really wary when I don't see any books in someone's space.  I've been called out on being snobbish before, but I honestly think it's a compatibility issue: I want to fuck someone who shares at least some of my interests and reading/literature/what have you is a possibly one of the greatest interests I have.  I'm socially inept and if I ever get as far as someone's room, I'm often just a quivering mess, so seeing their books around them is an anchor and I know that even if I can't make small talk with confidence, I can defend my own interests and discuss most literature with all the knowledge and ability I seem to lack elsewhere in my life. 

One of the most beautiful and depressing things that ever happened to me was when I realised I loved someone because I could picture their books merging with mine.  (That's oversimplified and I think there was more to it than just his books, but hey, for the sake of the story, let's say that was the most important factor)  He had copies of things I didn't have, but wanted, and vice versa.  We both had such stupidly large book collections that over five years, I was still reading stuff of his and still finding passages he had underlined.  When we finally moved in together, we got to spend an emotional, loving afternoon selecting bookshelves that would house our stupidly large collection.  Eventually we got oversized shelves with a ladder to get to the top shelves.  When we split, we had to weed out our own books, but he has my copy of John Updike's Couples with underlined passages that portray Piet as beautiful, cowardly and flawed while I got his copy of JG Ballard's the Kindness of Women, with a passage about the scars on a woman's body telling more than anyone could ever possibly read - firm reminders that we're both fucked up.

If someone has copies of depressing, messed-up shit like Mishima, Raymond Carver, JG Ballard's short stories, Yates, Cyril Connolly, etc - they can have me, because I think that kind of quiet self-loathing is really appealing and I still haven't learnt my lesson that a love of these books is generally a good indication of great problems and restlessness.  If I was better about casual sex, that probably wouldn't be an issue, though: we could fuck over something as simplistic as a shared flavour of depression and then move on.  I hope that I'll get to have sex with someone who has written about or read any of the British imperial fiction I spent a year reading and writing about, but the likelihood of finding someone who is as excited about Henry Rider Haggard and idea of the gentleman as a cultural export to the British empire is unlikely.  Thems the breaks.

Meanwhile: literary tattoos are something else I think I'd fall for.  I know the reason I have two of them is under the tentative and potentially false hope that they will get me laid.

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You can find my smut under: Ceto.

blissed

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Oh that whole bookshelf would be so much easier in an ipad I'd love the expeeience of reading from a wall size screen while on a climbing frame. A bit like siting in a tree and reading from a screen 5 meters away. All the health objections are sorted then. Your relaxed but perched using a range of muscles not sitting and reading at middle distance. If you usually need reading glasses then here you don't. This is the future, this the way it's gonna be

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viva

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Oof - talking about a bookshelf being condensed down into an iPad has a weird effect, it makes me spatially nauseous like being on a boat that's suddenly gone upside down.

Embracing the future is one thing, and we gonna either do that or get old and crotchety, bottling up book smells and mumbling to ourselves about kids these days. But acceptance and progression are no substitute for relishing the good things in life, the sensory things, the weight of things - which is where we can distinguish between 'the future' and ' a life without objects' - imagine them as a heavily intersecting Venn diagram, but not as synonymous things.

Part of embracing the future will be preserving the pleasures of the past, and for me, books are one of the primary symbols of those pleasures - again, textured, weighty, sometimes clumsy, a thing you can wrap yourself around, a thing you get lost in, a thing you can hold over your head to block the sun from your face. ideas you can touch, a thing to give from my hands into your hands that can tell you any number of things about who I am and who I want you to be for me. Books aren't soly about ideas. They are about smell, weight, process and experience. They are about imagination developed over time, the time of reading a book, and the longer that takes, the more imagination is stimulated.

Oh dear... Bobby stop me.  Since that was only the ragged edge of the binding when it comes to my feelings about books, I am going to make some space for others before I plunge back in with my must-reads and my emotional response to Dom's post.

blissed

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From: The bus station of the future

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

I'd love to read your post up on a screen like this and that appartment can have books too. Infact all the book fetish things you've mentioned would be kind of special if most people don't have physical books. There's lots of things we don't need but love to have and keep. Like intetesting pebbles from a beech. You can have your books as long as I can have one of these wall screens with gesture control. 

BTW if anyone here hasn't discoverd Sketchup and the 3D warehouse here it is
http://sketchup.google.com/

http://sketchup.google.com/3dwarehouse/

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Last edited by blissed (01-12-11 03:36:13)

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domC

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Ah!  Condensing my library and bookshelves to a collection of files on an ipad actually distresses me!  Those bookshelves I mentioned, in particular, were monumental - buying those was a bigger moment than when we went out and had someone custom build the bed we were calling our marital bed.  A computer screen doesn't have the same feel, no matter how aesthetically pleasing it is and how embedded into the design of a home it may be.  Similarly, merging ebook files to read in bed doesn't have the same connotations as handling a book that the person you love (or, are going to fuck?) has carried with them for years, has poured over, marked up, possibly gotten pages wet while reading in the bath... Electronic dog-eared pages aren't the same as a page that's had sections underlined, notes in someone's handwriting and coffee stains.  I realise you can do most of these things with ebooks, but it's never going to be the same as true marginalia.  I like the physicality of books, the aesthetics of books, the personalisation of books, that books will last far longer than an ebook file and that books are passed down from hand to hand (often through strangers, if you're like me and buy a lot from second-hand stores). 

I think ebooks have a time and a place and I love the idea of carrying a library with me if I am, say, travelling or as a more affordable way for uni students to have access to textbooks (I've noticed my uni library is stocking up on ebooks, which is fine by me: I'm all for reading something once on a screen just to suck information out).  All of that's great, but entirely unemotional.  When I first moved out of home, the boxes of my books outnumbered the sum of all my other possessions combined.  I am one of those people who is largely resistant to the idea that books will become outdated or some kind of collectable fetish object.  They're too close to my heart, too personalised, too much a part of me.  They're not like vinyl records to me - fun to collect, but outdated and impractical.  It's a huge turn-on to see someone as particular about books as I am - someone whose books are dog-eared, have stains over them, yellow pages and underlined sections throughout  (an aside: emily_c is my housemate and best friend - we are both ridiculous booksluts with credentials, but have very different attitudes to the treatment of books.  I am one of those people who treats books with tough-love, while emily collects rare books.  Perhaps the only things in emily's life that are treated with absolute care and attention, apart from her pet rabbits, are her books.)

Every book I purchase was bought with the sense that I am developing a library that I will carry with me from place to place, like a hermit crab.  That library is a working library that I draw on all the time, partly for my job, partly for study and more often, just for counsel and comfort.

With all of this said - I absolutely accept that this isn't for everyone.  Most people, in fact, don't need to lug a library around, but in all frankness, I'm about 90% less likely to fuck them if that's the case, to bring it back to the original topic of conversation. 

A year ago I almost bought a second-hand bookshop in country Victoria.  It was the most beautiful place I think I have ever seen and every week I regret that I couldn't find a way to cobble together just the little bit of extra money that could have made that my life.  Curating bookshops has been one of the most pleasurable things I've done for money.

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You can find my smut under: Ceto.

emily_c

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Registered: 24-02-11

Posts: 25

Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Dom's words about merging bookshelves as a marker in a relationship is something i find amazingly moving (and yes, i might have already known that story, but i still find it the most beautiful thing when others feel that too).  that's always been my quiet test - that when i felt that with someone, that i would want my books to mingle with theirs on the shelves, together as one whole collection, enriched and merged and varied and complementary, that i will have found a lover i can start to build a life with - a certain pedantry, a particular fondness for collecting rare things and treating them more tenderly than flesh, an odd but really anally retentive way of ordering them... mine is less of a working library than Dom's - it is a hungry beast, something of a curated collection based around specific obsessive themes.  you can watch my interests move and shift through the volumes.  i even make sure i am always housing the collection in low-lit rooms in order to prevent light damage.   one day, i want to do an ifm shoot surrounded by them.   

i have a terrible memory, but i remember where each and every book i own was purchased from.  i have no idea how i remember this, or why, but they are my safe haven.

blissed

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From: The bus station of the future

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

There you go, dom and emily my appartment now has a screen and swing for me and a bookshelf full of someone elses books

It's what you get use too and then love definitely. I use to write longhand on a peice of paper and found a screen inhibiting but now my subconscious is use to the screen and I prefer it. though I've never written a book I only write short stories. I love the immediacy that a bit like conversation it goes straight out and is read straight away. I can always collect my stuff if I think it's worth it and work it into a book monty python scetch running into the next style. That most writers write on a screen doesn't matter. How someone likes to read the work is the important thing.  I think you all have a point that books have an atmosphere and scene all of their own because they are always present. Which means the ideas in them perminantly occupy the living space like the tents in occupy wall street the bookshop and library means literary ideas perminantly occupy a public space. Where as ebooks are read, turned off and are then gone and invisable.

If there is a reduction in the material presence of books I think to in some way counter that a literary sculpture for ebooks would be good. A bit like a plant. As you touch various leaves you get different books on screen and the leaves have the titles actually wriiten on them and the entire leaf area carries the book cover graphic, and emily you can mingle your leaves with a lovers on the same tree You can also see what books someone has without the screen being on and those ideas have a material presence. I like that idea as a public sculpture but I prefer people not knowing immediatly what music I like or books I haven't read and then making judgements. Everyone has their own subconsciously created ideas and so the references and influences on them are complex and consciously unailable and they're not in a book they come straight from them. and I love to just experience those 1st without knowing any conscioius references when the subconscioius has millions of complex references (neural links) for each action.

Oh I have to show you my breakfast area, the view of the sea is gorgeous! I was so lucky to get this place

Welcome to the forum emily

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Last edited by blissed (01-12-11 03:38:24)

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jane_e

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Blissed, I just want to state (for the record) that I have a treasured copy of Mein Kamph. It was rescued during the heat of a particularly good summers day from a box by side of the road. It has a pleasing spine width and colour so it sits on my shelf and on my to-one-day-to-do list. If I had to give up every part of my identity except for one thing the only thing I would keep would be my books. They trace quite eloquently my path from twinkle to today. Every book whether read a hundred times or not at all has in some way shaped who I was, who I am, and who I will become. If you look at my bookshelf it is not hard to feel like you are looking at me -- the real true me. Most of my books are still housed in my childhood bedroom, but a few I carry with me. Picking and packing them was one of the more delicate parts of my last move. I had to get representative parts of my whole collection. I anticipated book judging and now welcome it. I love going through someones shelves and laughing at and loving the similarities and differences between our collections. I love the "really? you've read this?" moments and the "this is my favorite book of all time and I don't know a single person in the whole world that has a copy too" moments. Remembering books you had forgotten. Forgetting books you had remembered. I judge bookselves and coffee tables and bedside tables. No books or magazines (or pamphlets?) in a house unnerves me. What do people do if they don't read? Make bombs?

I'm with you on this one Viva, I welcome a cramp in my hand from a book filled with substance (or fluff) and weight, strained eyes from words I can't magically magnify, missing pages, basementy smells, the ability to set books aside or stay up all night with them. Ahhhhh. It goes on and on.

Some parts of my "books to judge" list are static but others are constantly evolving. So Bobby, if you want to know if your bookshelf passes the test....ya might just have to take me home.

blissed

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From: The bus station of the future

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

If you read mien kampf and instead of it being an interesting curiosity it becomes treasured in that your in love with the ideas and want a racist fascist superstate then yes I do think that makes someone a little less fuckable  

I have a copy too http://www.crusader.net/texts/mk/

I've read bits just now and I just found it a little bit boring, but my interest in hitler is his campaign material and from it, would I have been persuaded to vote for him. With his love of animals and ban on vivisection etc. I think by the time people were reading mien kampf they were probly sold on him or scared and looking for reasurance.

My bookshelf has a few books on oak timber frame construction as that info was impossible to get for download. My favourite is http://www.amazon.co.uk/Timber-framed-B … 0709060920

If I managed to find a download then it would sit in an ipad when those are cheaper and it's the kind of book I'd prefer in an ipad because it could contain video!!!! and animations of how joints are put together. I love Oak timber framed buildings and I'd love to build one if I can find someone I can watch do all the messy heavy stuff while I chat to them.

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Last edited by blissed (01-12-11 00:01:14)

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blissed

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From: The bus station of the future

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Hot guys reading books.

http://hotguysreadingbooks.tumblr.com/archive

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viva

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Real quick, Blissed, do you mind resizing your pictures before you post them here? These graphics especially are quite cool but they stretch the forums all crazy for me and Bobby, and possibly others. thanks!

Anyway, this thread is stupidly arousing for me. All you beautiful girl book-fiends and the language which starts to pour out of you when you wax eloquent about your books is more than enough proof for me about the value of those objects. Plus those hot guys reading books. Sigh. I could just stay afloat in this thread for weeks.

What do I read? Oh I am the biggest science fiction/fantasy nerd these days, and loving it. So I am snuggily making my way through the sorceresses and ivory castles of my youth. I recently discovered this amazing series about a woman who is the best whore in an alternate historical reality where whores are totally the cream of society, because she's like this special masochist, the best masochist of all. It's really well written and the character is 3-dimensional and relatable and her adventures are off the hook and there's 9 of them - and they're all big and fat - in fact, I'm sitting next to a box containing the next 4 of them right now <3 But I've read just about everything I've gotten my hands on in the last 22 or so years, so this fantasy nostalgia phase, is just one of many phases.

If your bookshelf boasts : Kurt Vonnegut, Philip K. Dick, bonus points for John Brunner, Heinlein, Chandler, Stephenson, the great dystopists (Orwell, Huxley, Zamyatin), Nin/Miller, Fay Weldon, bonus points if you have French's "the women's room", Anne Sexton, Bukowski, cummings, Rumi, Borges, Quabanni, Irving, Leonard Cohen, Nicholson Baker.... okay I could seriously do this, and enjoy doing this, all day. Must restrain self.

Pretty much, unless your bookshelf is full of shiny, barely thumbed bestsellers and self-help books, you're in with me. I guess I'm easy.

blissed

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From: The bus station of the future

Registered: 17-03-06

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Sorry, in Safari the old pics displayed inside the forum dimensions without a problem. It's fixed now. I don't know how sexy the timber framed buildings of England are but I think I'm the only unfuckable person in the thread

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viva

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Hehe Blissed don't worry you provide a valuable counterpoint, the rocket pack on the naked hippie girl in the forest!

blissed

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From: The bus station of the future

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Ha ha thanks that makes me happy

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aven frey

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Nah Blissed, that swing is hot, and the view is pretty good also. Do distant ships come past? I could read you some Joseph Conrad and you could record this and mix the audio over the images of distant ships and when you played it on your ipad wall thing chicks would be totes impressed. Totes.

Good art and cultural studies books would do it for me, especially Marina Warner, because then they're possibly going to like my art and it would be really so nice to be dating someone who actually liked my art!
Ngaio (do a search, she's hot) just loaned me some Toni Morrison and I'm hoping that when I give her my copy of Flannery O'Connor's 'Wise Blood' we can have babies, and then eat them.

A graceful merger of book collections is a perfect and beautiful reason to love someone. That is a lovely story.

jane_e

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Registered: 30-06-11

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

If your bookshelf boasts : Kurt Vonnegut, Philip K. Dick, bonus points for John Brunner, Heinlein, Chandler, Stephenson, the great dystopists (Orwell, Huxley, Zamyatin), Nin/Miller, Fay Weldon, bonus points if you have French's "the women's room", Anne Sexton, Bukowski, cummings, Rumi, Borges, Quabanni, Irving, Leonard Cohen, Nicholson Baker.... okay I could seriously do this, and enjoy doing this, all day. Must restrain self.

Viva, I would totally take your bookshelf home with me. Leonard Cohen is Canadian (just for the record) and despite his advancing age he have me on the kitchen floor absolutely any day of the week.

I have read exactly two sci-fi books (Enders Game and a Canticle for Leibwitz) and if you have them on your shelf they equate to one bonus piece each. I have to agree with Viva on the great dystopists. If you don't know the value of a soma a day we probably can't be friends. I will look kindly upon you if you have a couple Irving's. Double bonus points for Not Wanted on the Voyage. Subtract one point for the Da Vinci Code. Ditto that for Angles and Demons. I have never read either, but I don't like them. My sister loved them. If you don't make the cut, perhaps you can go take a look at her bookshelf. Children's books. If you have these and you aren't creepy about it -- add three points. Here we are talking Winny the Pooh, Olivia Saves the Circus and Old Turtle not Dr. Seuss and Curious George. Those don't count. I get stressed out if there are more than 2 or 3 of a series or author. If you have read all of Harry Potter and everything ever written by Anne Rice or Stephen King I assume you are obb-seeees-ive. Overall, I like there to be a good mix of solid literary type titles. It's nice if there are a couple that I haven't read but want too. I get especially excited by textbooks. If there is an Advanced Signals Processing book next to an Intro to Human Psychology I can only assume you are building a robot. And if you are building a robot it doesn't really matter what books you have. Does it?

blissed

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From: The bus station of the future

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Oh bobby tall ships dock at the key just outside the building This is a behind the scenes shot of you reading Heart of Darknes by Joseph Conrad to camera. When the story goes to Africa we can move the big pot plant into shot. I think that would be quite nice. You could read parts of it all over the ship as well, and if it fits the story from up the rigging.

Jane I have a text book http://www.amazon.co.uk/Timber-Framers- … 188926900X

I'll leave you to work out what kind of robot I'm building Quite seriously I'd love to build a human level artificial intelegence but haven't got the funding or training or access to technical expertise and engineering. just anocdotal observations from having a human brain of my own. But if I did have the expertise and funding available I think I could do it.

I think it's hot when someones art has ideas that excite my imagination and you think Ooooh yes!!  Like bobby's giant insect pics or Ngaio's pickled in a jar mini monsters.

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jane_e

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Jane I have a text book http://www.amazon.co.uk/Timber-Framers- … 188926900X

Blissed, your attempts to seduce me (or anyone on this thread it seems) with electronic books are simply doomed to fail. Talk of robots, however....

blissed

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From: The bus station of the future

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Jane I never want to seduce anyone. I think if your you as you want to be then that's what someone finds attractive, and if they don't no amount of trying will change that. Yayy!! for ipads!! Shame they're too expensive right now. They need to be £90 and A4 size for me to buy one, and if they were A4 size I would love one and try and get you to love them too

I am fascinated by robots!! and how the world will be different when they're fluid movers. and then if those fluid movers can be cheap and 3D printed at home. The upside will be a citizens wage for everyone and instead of work we have a range of activities and causes we enjoy, amazing architecture on earth and in space and locally grown organic permaculture food. The downside is a period of extreme poverty for some or many as we try to cling to our old econiomic model on the way to the citezens wage, and local war, and the break up of nations as local food and printed technology and sophisticated printed weapons  like tiny ninja assasin robots means we need virtually no trade and ideas of local soveriegnty are bound to surface as they did the last time the world was locally self sufficient. The only thing that can save us will be the millions of emotionally and cognatively intelligent human level (and way beyond) software agents that can parent us by being our freinds and amongst other things make custom TV shows with us in, straight from their volumous imagination that spell bind us like TV shows do. So yeah I think that's how things are gonna turn out Hope things turn out generally on the nice side though by us getting an Ai  singularity sooner than later.

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Last edited by blissed (02-12-11 00:24:21)

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VeronicaF

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

blissed did you download my brain while I was sleeping?

viva

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Re: If you go home with somebody and they don't have books, dont fuck them

Ooh haha Jane, I am totally obsessive, can we still be friends? I am one of those kids who grew up poor and reading fast, so as a child books were a quantity thing - the bigger the better, really. hence ive read everything by stephen king, Neil stephenson, etc etc. when i find a series or an author I like, I pull them as a blanket over my head and i eat until the blanket is unravelled and used up and dirty and thumbprinted and finished. and then I move on.

all the authors I listed, I have most likely read everything I could find that they wrote, except for heinlein who's got like a trillion crap pulp novels - and tbh, i've read most of them. Of course I read all the Harry Potters - who reads just one?! When I was a child I spent long hours in bookshops bumming out words, thumbing through yard sale FREE bins for potential gems, now that I'm rich and grownup, I still do those things but also I can REALLY satisfy my urges and I buy my books not one at a time, but entire SERIES or COLLECTIONS at a time, and then I immerse myself therein, oh it is DELICIOUS....

my poetry I savor, treating myself to one slim volume at a time.

in the US we don't have this problem, but here even 2nd hand books are expensive, and new books are off the charts - paperbacks for $19, hello. So I buy from abe books. buck a book, baby.

Jane have you read Cohen's fiction? Oh boy.