Same Sex Mutual Masturbation

HiFlyer601 · 07-06-06 15:00:04

Can we revisit this topic? I think that the practice of masturbating in the company of another person or persons of the same sex is more prevalent than the last thread indicted.

Straight males watch female and hetero porn, and receive their primary stimulation from that. However, there is a degree of extra stimulation by "watching" and comparing with the other male as the session progresses.

Females, especially married neighbors or friends, are increasingly likely to watch males and hetero couples on video and masturbate openly together.

Comments?

HF

ashmedi · 07-06-06 15:03:10

I'm male, and have absolutely no desire to see or be near another male. I only downloaded 80% of the BA clips, the 20% male have no interest.

Burlesque · 07-06-06 15:26:31

Yes, call me homophobic, but I have never had any desire to watch or participate in sexual activities involving other men. I don't mind watching a man and a woman having sex, but that is of course a completely different matter.

Burlesque.

ashmedi · 07-06-06 15:39:54

Burlesque wrote:

. . . I don't mind watching a man and a woman having sex,Burlesque.

I don't even find much joy in that because it just means she is having fun with someone else other than me

Burlesque · 07-06-06 16:36:57

I see: all the women of the world are supposed to be part of your global harem, are they?

Burlesque.

Elfman · 07-06-06 16:49:16

Welcome to the forum HighFlyer601. As I said on the other thread I have not done this since my very early teens and have no desire to. However I do accept that my feelings on this are largely due to cultural prejudices. Women masterbating are seen as beautiful and erotic whereas men are seen as crude, dirty and sad. I feel this on a gut level even though I am old enough and (should be) wise enough to know better.

Elfman.

Last edited by Elfman (07-06-06 16:52:05)

Warmtouch · 07-06-06 18:33:29

I'm open to the idea in principle; in practice I have only ever met two men with whom I felt enough of a bond that I would be interested in interacting with them sexually, and neither one, I don't think, was open to the idea. It would have been very difficult even to suggest it without placing our relationship at risk anyway -- and we're no longer close, so it's not an issue. I don't expect it to ever happen.

In principle, possibly; in practice, I'm too picky.

ashmedi · 07-06-06 18:36:04

Burlesque wrote:

I see: all the women of the world are supposed to be part of your global harem, are they?
Burlesque.

That would work for me very well thank you very much

HiFlyer601 · 07-06-06 19:02:45

How many people have ever visited an adult theater and secretly or openly masturbated to a porno flick?

We there any other guys around?

blissed · 07-06-06 22:58:21

Ha ha I can't say I've really ever been hot on that idea

Nowaysis · 07-06-06 23:01:18

Mutual masturbation between people of the same sex needn't, in my opinion, be about sexual attraction to, or the desire to perform sexual activities with someone of the same sex. It can be simply about sex.

I think I commented on this in the thread bout whether or not there will be men on IFM, and I'll say the same thing here: the arousal in such a sitaution isn't necessarily directed towards, or derived from the other person per se, and his or her gender, but can also be from the fact that there is another person, and that you're both engaging in a sexual activity, gender be damned.

This could account for the fact that most people who say they've masturbated with their friends seem to have done it in their teens, when anything even remotely connected with sexuality is the most exciting thing imaginable, and basically undressing to have a shower will give you an erection.

[hmm.. those two first paragraphs sort of overlap, my old writing teacher from the English Department would have my head for this ]

Last edited by Nowaysis (07-06-06 23:03:11)

msnevil · 08-06-06 05:51:03

Liandra, I know I'm going to regret this, But do you remember the "name" of the study?

And is most of the men here in denial?

I know I'm going to ruffle some feather's. But I believe that most men are "Bi".

Look at Normative porn. It's always focused on the penis and its exploits. And the ever populer "money shot". It's all about the Man's pleasure and the woman is but a "thing" to use for his pleasure.

Switch the female for a Animal\Man. And its still the same thing. A "Man\Men and his\thier penis".

nihpuad · 08-06-06 07:25:36

msnevil wrote:

Look at Normative porn. It's always focused on the penis and its exploits. And the ever populer "money shot".

The comedian Ron White (one of the "Blue Collar Comedy" guys, for U.S. readers) has a very funny bit in which he "proves" to his homophobic (aka redneck) brother that he's not all that straight after all, by asking a series of questions about the porn he watches. It doesn't bear transcription, I'm afraid, but if you have access to Comedy Central, be on the lookout for his latest solo special (no, not that kind of "solo special"! )

That said...

msnevil wrote:

It's all about the Man's pleasure and the woman is but a "thing" to use for his pleasure.

...I don't really buy this Dworkinesque view of porn. I don't think it's the objectification and using of women (though it's certainly present in some mainstream porn) that's the point; I think it's the sex.

Further, I don't think a man has to be either homophobic or self deluded to not be turned on by other men. Plenty of people are not turned on by plenty of things, and it doesn't mean they're either hateful or self-deceiving.

For myself, I find many sorts of sexual acitivity visually stimulating, and I'm perfectly happy to look at naked men and hard cocks in that context... but when it comes to solo male or all-male scenes, they just don't do anything for me. Not for any deep-seated reason other than... well, boys are icky and girls are swell!

Frankly, I think it's something of a miracle (albeit a happy one indeed) that anyone, male or female, wants to have sex with us guys.

Warmtouch · 08-06-06 11:58:41

dauphinb2 wrote:

msnevil wrote:
Look at Normative porn. It's always focused on the penis and its exploits. And the ever populer "money shot".
...
It's all about the Man's pleasure and the woman is but a "thing" to use for his pleasure.
...I don't really buy this Dworkinesque view of porn. I don't think it's the objectification and using of women (though it's certainly present in some mainstream porn) that's the point; I think it's the sex.
Further, I don't think a man has to be either homophobic or self deluded to not be turned on by other men. Plenty of people are not turned on by plenty of things, and it doesn't mean they're either hateful or self-deceiving.

I agree. Kinsey said, "Look, it's a continuum," and I think that's so obviously true that there would be little point in discussing it but for the fact that we're stuck with these tiresome binary labels -- mostly produced by centuries of Christian (and other) repression.

I don't think the money shot has anything to do with male-male arousal. It's more of a puerile "how far can you shoot it" thing. Also -- speaking as someone who has done a little filmmaking -- I think it has partly to do with the conventions of the business. You want to capture interesting events. Male orgasm doesn't look like much if everything's hidden inside. And from what I understand, female porn stars actually don't like to be ejaculated into (although if they think it's protecting them from AIDS they're sorely mistaken). It's just messy and if they're doing three or four guys that day it's going to get very messy. So you've got a built-in reason for doing it outside and once you're there, you may as well film it.

Also, the emphasis on the penis isn't "I want to do what she's doing to him," it's "I wish I were him, getting that done to me." Conventional porn is aspirational. It lets us fantasize that that's OUR big, perpetually-hard penis that is the subject of such loving and extended attention.

Jakeview · 08-06-06 19:44:21

Warmtouch wrote:

Also, the emphasis on the penis isn't "I want to do what she's doing to him," it's "I wish I were him, getting that done to me." Conventional porn is aspirational. It lets us fantasize that that's OUR big, perpetually-hard penis that is the subject of such loving and extended attention.

Exactly!

stolengirlfriend · 09-06-06 06:08:42

Warmtouch wrote:

Also, the emphasis on the penis isn't "I want to do what she's doing to him," it's "I wish I were him, getting that done to me." Conventional porn is aspirational. It lets us fantasize that that's OUR big, perpetually-hard penis that is the subject of such loving and extended attention.

Maybe this is just me, but I really have no desire to be the one "getting that done to me". I'm sure I'm probably in the minority when it comes to this though.

I watch pornography just for what it is - visual stimulation. I don't fantasize about being in the scene or being with the person, I just enjoy the view.

msnevil · 09-06-06 09:17:46

I respectfully disagree.

I find no association to the Guy. For me, He is a selfish man. Who care's only for his own pleasure. And the woman is but a product for his satisfaction.

The female may as well as be a blow up doll.

To me conventional Porn is degrading. It focus is on the "penis" not the "Clit". On his desires, not her desires. And to me it degrades the woman as a "object" and not a real "human".

For me, Real "porn" is Amatuer porn. It's not a "act". It's real. And both partners desire's are met. He takes care of her Needs, and she takes care of his. And there is mutual love and respect for the other.

Perhaps I'm a hopeless romantic. But I think there has to be more to porn then a "Guy and his penis".

please note: At least in Guy\guy porn both partners have orgasms. Its rare to see a female orgasm in normative porn.

Warmtouch wrote:

Also, the emphasis on the penis isn't "I want to do what she's doing to him," it's "I wish I were him, getting that done to me." Conventional porn is aspirational. It lets us fantasize that that's OUR big, perpetually-hard penis that is the subject of such loving and extended attention.

msnevil · 09-06-06 09:30:03

I think humans are like animals. When thier young, they experiment with each other. As they get older. The pecking order is established. And they become part of the herd mentality. (like the greeks)

I remember as a teenager comparing my self to "others". Personly, I had no "Desire" for them. But the curiosity was there. And I'm sure other's "curiosity" led them to experimenting.

Jakeview · 09-06-06 10:13:54

msnevil...you're absolutely right but you're the exception. The problem with mainstream porn is marketing. Men are still the main consumers of porn so porn is made for men. The market determines what scenarios are created and the masses prefer male-dominant, male-orgasmic, giant-cock fuck films. Those of us who prefer watching a woman get hers or even watching a more intimate and loving approach to erotica are on the fringe. Quite simply, we don't make corporate producers of porn enough money(yet!)

For example, if you search the internet for "facials," you'll probably find a near infinite amount of websites. Personally, I don't get what's so interesting about some guy shooting a load on a woman's face but, regardless, it's there in abundance. A lot of men like it so it's been created for their consumption.

Supply and demand. Capitalism at its finest.

nihpuad · 10-06-06 07:55:44

Liandra wrote:

I am bi-sexual therefore everyone else must be like me really.... god that's so arrogant!

Not so much arrogant as natural (which is to say, we're all naturally "arrogant" in this way to some degree): People just normally want to think everybody is like they are, and that anyone who isn't like they are must be somehow defective, because that validates their own sense of self. The best among us -- and I'm quite sure you're one of the best among us -- recognize this impulse for what it is, and try, as much as possible, not to act on it.

I'm sure your point is correct: The belief that everybody is "really" bi is just as false as the assertion that everybody naturally ought to be straight. That said, I also agree that...

Liandra wrote:

...if society wasn't so hegemonically heterosexual more men would be bi-curious.

...if by "bi-curious" you mean more straight guys would be willing to test their straightness "in the lab" rather than by analysis. I'm sure social pressure inhibits folks' willingness to experiment at (or outside) the edges of their natural preferences; I'm not so sure it's as effective in causing folks to change or suppress their true sexual identities.

As for the "money shot" discussion, for me watching porn is a surrogate for voyeurism: Porn is best for me when it's most like watching real sex. Since so much else about mainstream porn (even mainstream so-called amateur porn) is obviously fake, the money shots (and closeups of penetration) become important to the overall erotic effect, even though they're not intrinsically appealing from an aesthetic POV: They serve as evidence that at least something about what I'm watching is real.

Of course, since I discovered BA and now IFM, I hardly watch mainstream porn anymore, because I have such trust that what I see on these sites is all real. I confess I miss the intercourse, though. Y'all need to get cracking on www.weboinkourselves.com!

PS to All: That was a joke. Please don't start harrassing Richard or Liandra about when WBO is going to open!

Elfman · 10-06-06 10:42:03

Liandra wrote:

I once contemplated the idea that all humans are innately bi-sexual and that anything else is just social conditioning, or an extreme rejection of it. However I think that is wrong, and probably just immature projection. I am bi-sexual therefore everyone else must be like me really.... god that's so arrogant! I do think that if society wasn't so hegemonically heterosexual more men would be bi-curious. I do believe a lot of men are repressed, in that Freudian sense, and this process begins in early childhood and as adults they are not consciously aware of it. The society they are part of, and the familial upbringing that surrounded them, does put pressure on men to do that in order that they be accepted as a part of the main (power wielding) group.

I don't find your viewpoint arrogant Liandra and I think that there is much truth in what you are saying here. We cannot help but be shaped by the society we grow up in. We are what we are largely because of where and when we are. (does that make sense?).

Jakeview wrote:

For example, if you search the internet for "facials," you'll probably find a near infinite amount of websites. Personally, I don't get what's so interesting about some guy shooting a load on a woman's face but, regardless, it's there in abundance.

I think I have said this before but I have to say that I find this recurring image profoundly disturbing. I see it as a shocking act of debasement and it worries me that it is such a common theme in conventional pornography. I don't want to go off on a feminist rant here (men are allowed to have them as well) but I think that so much of conventional porn is designed specificaly to debase women and the number of rape oriented sites you come across is frankly alarming.

Elfman.

Warmtouch · 10-06-06 12:57:20

Elfman wrote:

Jakeview wrote:
For example, if you search the internet for "facials," you'll probably find a near infinite amount of websites. Personally, I don't get what's so interesting about some guy shooting a load on a woman's face but, regardless, it's there in abundance.
I think I have said this before but I have to say that I find this recurring image profoundly disturbing. I see it as a shocking act of debasement and it worries me that it is such a common theme in conventional pornography. I don't want to go off on a feminist rant here (men are allowed to have them as well) but I think that so much of conventional porn is designed specificaly to debase women and the number of rape oriented sites you come across is frankly alarming.
Elfman.

That was my initial impression as well, but when you think about it, it's predicated on the assumption that what comes out of the penis is dirty and debasing. Abandon that assumption, and suddenly it's not quite such a loaded event.

Consider that people get into beating each other and urinating on each other -- men and women. Now urine really IS a waste product, and beating produces pain and welts. And yet they're just more odd variants of human sexuality. Compared to urine and pain, a little semen is pretty mild.

Until recently I would have said that something that distinguishes facials is that only the man can do it. Then I saw Jasmin's interview and found out that men were more or less lining up to have her to it them.

I asked a woman I know and whose opinion I can trust, when I was convinced, like you, that it was an expression of male brutality. She said she felt that in the right circumstances, with the right man, it could be very hot. I was quite surprised.

And therein lies the problem with porn. It creates false expectations about what women want. Women don't always answer the door to the fridge repairman (love those Grolsch beer commercials -- "this porno movie is not ready yet!") and start ripping off his clothes, nor do they all want facials.

I've reached a point at which I pretty much don't condemn any sexual activity no matter how bizarre as long the participants are of age and capable of giving consent, withdrawing consent at any time, and able to understand what's going on.

HiFlyer601 · 14-06-06 14:47:02

Wow!! All sorts of threads within the original question. And nobody admitted to ever jacking off in a theater or arcade!!

Okay, I find women overwhelmingly sexy. I think I treat all people as sexual equals. I enjoy giving orgasms as well as getting them. At my age, I like to lovingly and attentively give 3-4 before I settle for a wonderful ONE!

I'd prefer being with a soft, warm, live female, but..... when that is not available, I like to masturbate to porn as a substitute. I hate rough stuff. I hate fake stuff. My arousal is intensified if I am masturbating and someone around or beside me is reacting verbally to what I am seeing. It could be M or F, but the verbal reacting is a voyeuristic boost. I may even "watch" the other person if it is feasible and hope I see an orgasm.

HF

Elfman · 14-06-06 16:14:59

HiFlyer601 wrote:

Wow!! All sorts of threads within the original question. And nobody admitted to ever jacking off in a theater or arcade!!

Sorry. I missed this question. Yes I have.

Nowaysis · 15-06-06 23:07:46

On that subject, I once masturbated (to orgasm) in one of those art/poster stores while leafing through the pinup posters. The things you do when young, dumb and full of hormones...

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Same Sex Mutual Masturbation

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