Failures

metrosexualbloke · 10-09-08 23:35:13

When Masters and Johnston observed men and women masturbating in the lab a certain number of attempts ended in failure, as the pressure of performing in front of the lab technicians got too much. More men than women had orgasmic failure, I understand, and women sometimes only when pushing for a second or third orgasm at the technicians request.

Statistically I would guess that there must be a few IFM reels in the vault where the journey was started, but the destination was not reached.

I would like to see these. How reassuring and how intimate to watch a failed, but brave, attempt.

Soberman · 11-09-08 04:15:31

Based on your two posts, you may have this site mistaken with another. This is the site about the "beauty of the female orgasm" not A for effort. Don't know about you but when I wank and fail, I don't feel particularly good and I doubt anyone else would either. Why would you be interested in seeing someone's possible discomfort?

Last edited by Soberman (11-09-08 04:16:05)

Cate · 11-09-08 06:01:55

I'm not sure you realise how what you're asking for feels for the people in the videos. Please keep in mind that this site is not just for the subscribors to enjoy but also aims to be a positive experience for the contributors.

hyperballad · 11-09-08 07:45:17

A little while ago I did some filming in my bath tub and was unable to orgasm. It was on my own time, in my house and no one was actually expecting the content but I was almost reduced to tears. It was very frustrating and after trying for some time I just ended up psyching myself out, getting upset and giving up.

This sort of thing when caught on film is such a delicate and tender thing and the idea of this footage being used here (or anywhere) is mortifying and not so much that I couldn't orgasm but that I had an upsetting sexual experience.

And I'm inclined to believe that if I felt that bad when no one had any expectations of me, as in it wasn't an organised shoot, no one set up lighting, cameras etc - if it was in the studio and I had come in specifically to film for this site I would feel much much worse.

Would you like people to watch your experiences where you're unable to come? How would that make you feel? I seriously doubt its something you would actually want to do.

I don't think you have fully thought about your request and I don't think you have considered how it actually feels to have such an experience captured on film, let alone put on the internet...

bigrig · 11-09-08 20:17:54

I think the request is inappropriate . Failure is something I don't think should be shared. IMO. However, if the staff at IFM was to put together a BLOOPER film, I think that would be funny. Nothing better than laughing when you are trying to have an orgasm.

phexy · 12-09-08 04:01:47

I know I sure ain't laughing when I can't climax. It's bloody frustrating, and I'm sure somebody watching my frustration wouldn't find that funny.

Soberman · 12-09-08 04:17:17

Metro and Bigrig: I'm sorry to add that your comments sound like someone watching animals perform in the circus or zoo. Take a moment to think how insensitive your entries are.

metrosexualbloke · 13-09-08 20:22:56

Sorry if I have upset some people-that was not my intention. I am not into seeing people humiliated. I think I set the wring tone when I used the word "failues". This was the word that I recall was used by M & J, and it is not a term I agree with. Like M & J some of you offended folks do appear to be focussing too much on orgasm. I like this site because it is not like traditional porn where the target is a spectacular performance, but there is still a formula of the fims ending in climax. Soberman I would prefer that the site was not dominated by the "beauty of the female orgasm", but of the beauty of non goal orientated sexual expression. The point I was tryiing to make is that the fear of performance failure must have ruined many sex lives and is never shown in pornography. I would hope that, by showing films where climax is not achieved, or faked, that a more mature outlook regarding sex than has prevailed to date, would be nurtured. I would view any film of sexual expression as a success where the parties involved are happy for it to be out there. I would be happy to see people expressing themselves sexually, to their "satisfaction", where orgasm was not (for whatever reason) the goal.

bigrig · 17-09-08 00:28:13

Soberman wrote:

Metro and Bigrig: I'm sorry to add that your comments sound like someone watching animals perform in the circus or zoo. Take a moment to think how insensitive your entries are.

(Hmm let me see. How do you explain that it is not the failure, nor the attention of the failure you were talking about. Okay, lets see if we can turn this thread into a positive. I wouldn't want to see anyone fail, but it might make people smile if IFM made a blooper vid of silly things, like, dropping a vib, or getting a hand caught in a bra, or bursting out laughing when your trying to be serious. Maybe its comments after the end of the shooting. Try to get them to see the lighter side of life, Okay lets try)

Hey IFM. I dont want to see people fail, but if you had some stuff to make a Blooper vid. It might make some members laugh or at least smile. Heaven knows there are some real tightasses here.

Sorry If I offended ANYONE

hyperballad · 17-09-08 01:19:02

bigrig wrote:

Hey IFM. I dont want to see people fail, but if you had some stuff to make a Blooper vid. It might make some members laugh or at least smile. Heaven knows there are some real tightasses here.

Hmmm. Somehow, I think our editors would rather be putting together actual content for the site, rather than trawling through vids to try and find 'funny' things... In fact I don't know if there is even that many 'bloopers' in our archives.

And to be honest I personally don't think a blooper vid is appropriate to the site, we also may potentially offend the contributors whose content we use in this context.

I know you probably think its a harmless laugh, but in my opinion it isn't really what we're about. Besides its a bit hard to justify the time and effort it would take to create such a vid when we all already have so much work to do...

You haven't offended me, I just don't think IFM bloopers is such a great idea.

bigrig · 17-09-08 03:46:54

As per my original post, I did not think this site was to show failure. I was only making a suggestion, that "no fun intended" it was an in appropriate request from Metrobloke, and would rather see something happy and light hearted.

nuff said, I will shut my fingers now.
Love your vids Hyper.

blissed · 17-09-08 04:03:37

I think there are delightful moments that make you laugh already, look at anything with Dandy in or most of the interviews. I think the idea of a blooper vid is a bit immature and thats saying something coming from me :)

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artist_kesia · 21-09-08 15:00:00

uh oh...I've got to slink away somewhere because I enjoy a good giggle after an orgasm too..

aggie64 · 22-09-08 00:34:07

Howdy, Kesia, your giggle is one of my favorite things. Any chance of another IFM episode?

artist_kesia · 22-09-08 03:09:28

Possibly my lovely young man! Judging by this thread however it can't be sexual ambling- It will have to end in an orgasm...

hyperballad · 22-09-08 03:14:50

artist_kesia wrote:

uh oh...I've got to slink away somewhere because I enjoy a good giggle after an orgasm too..

Its not about laughing during/before/after orgasm that I have a problem with. Not at all and I'm sorry if you read it that way. I do however, not like or see the value of an IFM bloopers vid.

theant · 23-09-08 00:11:35

If you look back at the start of this thread, you'll see that Metrosexualbloke never suggested showing "bloopers", meaning something you can laugh at. He merely suggested that if we are honest about masturbation, we should recognise that sometimes it doesn't result in orgasm, and that he would find it reassuring to see that happen to contributors. Now, I don't agree with him: I can't imagine that contributors would want us to watch such videos, any more than I would want to watch a video of myself trying but failing to get an erection. But I do think the conversation about "bloopers" has rather misrepresented what he was talking about.

gala · 23-09-08 01:28:04

Yeah, it was someone else who suggested a 'blooper' vid, just scroll up and you'll find it.

I don't really know how much you can ever be totally 'honest' about masturbation in a medium like this one. Sure, we achieve a degree of 'reality' that other projects don't or can't - because they have camera operators, because they don't emphasize the comfort of the contributor, etc etc etc. But the aim of this project we are working on at IFM doesn't really encompass things like not reaching orgasm, because the site is about the 'beauty of female orgasm'. It's built-in. Of course it's a real true fact that sometimes you don't get there, but what would be the use of representing that here, apart from acknowledging something we all know to be true anyway?

For people who aren't so much into seeing others come, and who are more into seeing blow jobs or fucking or toe-sucking or other isolated acts, maybe it would work to make porn that didn't have any orgasms in it. If you were an altruist out there to make everyone who's had the experience of not coming feel good about that having happened, maybe that would work for you, but for those of us who make it for a living and have to sell it to someone else in order to pay rent, I just don't really see it working. I agree that it is just as well to have non-orgasmic sexual experiences sometimes, but maybe the promotion of that practice is best done out of the sphere of visual representation. There's literature and audio and seminars and other places where that's discussed and really I think the most you can do with that information is to practice it yourself.

hyperballad · 24-09-08 01:46:13

theant wrote:

If you look back at the start of this thread, you'll see that Metrosexualbloke never suggested showing "bloopers", meaning something you can laugh at. He merely suggested that if we are honest about masturbation, we should recognise that sometimes it doesn't result in orgasm, and that he would find it reassuring to see that happen to contributors. Now, I don't agree with him: I can't imagine that contributors would want us to watch such videos, any more than I would want to watch a video of myself trying but failing to get an erection. But I do think the conversation about "bloopers" has rather misrepresented what he was talking about.

theant - If you had red the entire thread you would have seen this:

bigrig wrote:

I think the request is inappropriate . Failure is something I don't think should be shared. IMO. However, if the staff at IFM was to put together a BLOOPER film, I think that would be funny. Nothing better than laughing when you are trying to have an orgasm.

Thanks!

bigrig · 25-09-08 16:38:21

I withdraw my earlier comment about a Blooper vid. It was my mistake and I regret making that comment. I apologize for offending those who were, and for what was viewed as an immature request.
To the Ladies of the site, I appreciate everyone of you who are before the camera or behind, and I again wish to apologize for my offense remarks.

blissed · 25-09-08 19:17:32

Thanks for doing that bigrig, can't speak for anyone else but I appreciate it.

.

hyperballad · 26-09-08 02:21:26

Oh hey bigrig, its all good! My most recent comment in this thread wasn't designed to hammer my point of view home to you. I was just trying to rectify some confusion that seemed to be going on.

Everyone is entitled to their own ideas and the value of them - by the same token I am entitled to disagree with you, but what we all can agree on is that different things appeal to different people...

Please don't think I'm hatin' here. I really don't think you've made a suggestion in a tactless or thoughtless way and it was in a genuine light hearted vein.

Last edited by hyperballad (26-09-08 02:23:28)

gold0monkey · 26-09-08 22:17:09

when i masturbate i never fail.

blissed · 26-09-08 22:40:08

Well done, I think you should get some kind of award and put it in your resume :)

.

DrNathaniel · 03-10-08 20:44:25

Off topic, but when someone mentioned 'blooper reel', I thought of people falling over while trying to get their underwear off. Now THAT would be funny.

Lord knows it's happened to me enough times. Sometimes I wasn't even drunk

#1 10-09-08 23:35:13

Failures

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