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Ha ha I've just written a poem but it's really best suited to being a kids ilustrated book. Nowaysis poem is good and so is dyslexius
Be nice nice if Gala could read a small piece of particles of Wayne, I'd post that mp3 too, that would make such a good short film
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Last edited by blissed (01-11-06 05:23:07)
(Self made tycoon and independant financial advisor to the stars)
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Well I'm pretty fickle, Blissed, as I'm afraid this is attention rather than sympathy...
...Gala could read a small piece of particles of Wayne, I'd post that mp3 too, that would make such a good short film...
...but your idea is just too compelling.
As glorious as that life-affirming prose is just sitting there on an HTML page waiting to be read by one and all, I'd love to hear a reading of it (recognizing that Gala might prefer to just leave all as is -- authors often prefer this -- and wishing to defer to her if that's the case). As I tried to express in my own little paragraph about it, I think "Particles of Wayne" is monstrously beautiful.
--dyslexius
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On the topic of erotic fiction.
I'm almost done with my submission for Sonic Erotica.com
Just not sure if it's what they're looking for. Do you think I should post some of it and run it by you guys or let Richard and the gang at SE give the yay or nay?
Well... there was nothing in my dark side that really interested me. I guess I just dont have what it takes to be a bad guy.
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...Do you think I should post some of it and run it by you guys...?
Absolutely, I sure do, and I base that on authority handed down to us by the originator of this thread:
...To the writers, I think the only limit is the reach of common sence, the board's moderator will remove anything inapropriate...
Looking forward to it, TWW.
--dyslexius
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Found this on Youtube and following The_Elfman's recent wonderful rendition of Hamlet's "To be or not to be" soliloquy, thought it quite apt ..... irreverent, but very funny!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQk8VdTp … ed&search=
Enjoy
JF
Last edited by Journeyfan (02-11-06 11:19:42)
"Crying to the sky .... searching for a silver lining,
Hoping that the clouds I'm climbing aren't hiding rain."
Bill Nelson - "Crying To The Sky"
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Thanks for that JF. Very funny.
Honi Soit Qui Mal Y Pense
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Ok, remember this is only a bit of it, and it's my first stab (pun intended) at erotic fiction.
Sarah
We learn a new step to our routine this night; she lays a hand on my shoulder to push me off the stage. She stops at the wings waiting for the next instruction.
While other partners have let go and are uncomfortably standing side-by-side, nervous of what to do next, she stands there with her hand on my shoulder. I wonder if she can tell (that) I work out.
The Choreographer teaches us to lift our partners as high as we can. She uses me as an example as my partner watched on. I tried to stifle a laugh as I watched the other couples try to lift their partners. Here were partners who had been doing this for months, some even years; and here I was, no formal training, no real interest in dancing, taking to the floor like I had done it for years.
My partner and I began to practice.
She’s lighter than I thought.
My head fills with thoughts of the things I want to do to her, and as I lift her I feel her breasts brush past my face. I’m not sure if she noticed, but then again, I don’t care.
It’s difficult to not think about going down on her when her pussy is just under my chin and only two thin layers of clothing away.
I wonder what she sounds like… would she moan… would she purr… would she grunt… would she gasp or sigh… talk… cry… giggle…Oh god. I’m so perverted.
I want her so bad; it’s torture. To be so close to something you want and not be able to take it.
I don’t want it to stop.
Well... there was nothing in my dark side that really interested me. I guess I just dont have what it takes to be a bad guy.
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As glorious as that life-affirming prose is just sitting there on an HTML page waiting to be read by one and all, I'd love to hear a reading of it (recognizing that Gala might prefer to just leave all as is -- authors often prefer this -- and wishing to defer to her if that's the case). As I tried to express in my own little paragraph about it, I think "Particles of Wayne" is monstrously beautiful.
--dyslexius
thanks. you're right - i am happy with the piece as it is. it wasn't intended to be a spoken-word piece. i don't think i should want to record it.
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...my first stab (pun intended) at erotic fiction.
Sarah
...her pussy...
I have a question that's not directly related to your story -- but this reminded me of a ritual invented (so I thought) by a g/f of a long time ago. She proclaimed that I was to refer to her vaginal region as "Sarah" and the she'd refer to my genitalia as "Stanley." Is there something universal about this? ...Maybe a legend I'm unaware of? A post-enlightenment English thing?
:) --dyslexius
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I dunno. I wanted to think of something less offencive than c*nt and less clinical than vagina. But since most of the contributers on SE used pussy as their word of choice, I thought it would be the most useful.
I guess you could say that it was you ex- tried to establish a code for spontanious sex by reffering to the regions by names.
Think of it this way:
You've got a few friends around and you two are feeling frisky, but you dont want them to know. You ask her to give you a hand to give the dog a bone. But you dont have a dog?
Hmmm... Your friends think... Maybe they're going for a quick shag and dont want us to know.
By reffering to your bits by name you two could easily say, in front of your mates:
-"How's Sarah feeling?"
-"Is Stanley awake?"
Then duck out and say you'll phone them.
Kinda reminds me of the story of Pierre the french fighter pilot...
Well... there was nothing in my dark side that really interested me. I guess I just dont have what it takes to be a bad guy.
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The_West_Wind, and Sarah
What I like most about this, so far, is two things: your setting in the performing arts; some kind of formal dance presentation, and the premise of unfulfilled desire.
I wonder though, why say "...things I want to do to her" and not "...things I want to do with her?" For me it would hold more promise for the rest of the story as you develop it.
--dyslexius
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...I guess you could say that it was you ex- tried to establish a code for spontanious sex by reffering to the regions by names.
I think you've nailed it!
--dyslexius
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Because I just remembered I wrote this once upon a time, and bcause I need something to take my mind of the fact that I'm not writing enough:
Rings of smoke through the trees
tell us stories of what we might be,
had we but world enough and time
Take my hand, and give me your life,
let me show you a different kind of world
where the dust has settled
the fog has cleared
the smoke disappeared
and the light's always nearFor even if we walk in the darkness,
yay, in the valley of the shadow of death,
the world which I speak of now
will never leave a soul 'bout to drown
There, there is always another
to hold your hand
to help understand
the lay of the land
and what fate has planned
I shouldn't say anything about it before you lot get to make up your own minds, so as to not bias you needlessly, but I really can't help myself. I'm not sure what my own feelings tward this piece are, but the two prominent loans from other writers always make me smile a bit. Also, the first half always strikes me as fitting better into its own form than the second does, but given my lack of form in general, I don't know how much that actually matters.
Let us scatter our clothes to the wind
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Rings of smoke through the trees...
I like this, Nowaysis. You have one foot in that tradition of the romantics that I myself consumed voraciously once'd upon a time (I gobbled up the lieder of Schubert like there was no tomorrow, and all of that Rilke, Müller, Goethe, and Möricke left its mark, for sure).
I see the Psalm 23, but not sure what the other "loan" is. The "rings of smoke" recalled Eliot's "yellow fog," but I know that's just my own recontextualization.
--dyslexius
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I sometimes label myself a "modern romantic", so that feels nice to hear. I've never been much for modern, or post modern stuff, with (sub) urban landscapes, man machine-problematics, cold materials in a harsh and sharp world, and what not. I sometimes feel like I'm almost cheating if I write poetry without invoking a slightly more... spiritual(?) mood. Almost.
The Bible (and all thereto belonging scriptures, such as psalms) are so much common knowledge and property, Ididn't actually consider that much of a loan, but it did occur to me as I was writing my comment.
More to the point, the rings of smoke are from Stairway to Heaven, and so a much more modern loan than one might think (seeing as it is usually more credible, and thus more popular, to borrow from masters now gone and all but forgotten). The second loan is perhaps a bit more obscure, but "had we but world enough and time" is a line (the opening line in fact) from one of my favourites of the poems we read when I studied English a few years ago. Just to piss off anyone looking for easy answers, I'm going to encourage you to find it yourselves.
Let us scatter our clothes to the wind
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Since Siobhan suggested we should resurrect some interesting old threads I thought that I would give this one a kick just for her.
Siobhan?
Elfman
Honi Soit Qui Mal Y Pense
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Maybe it would be interesting to think about WHY you all write / create? (Gala said already).
Last edited by Calenture (05-12-06 11:17:54)
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From personal experience, I write or do artistic things simply because I cant get a job doing anything else.
I like my creativity, I like what I do, but sadly that dosent bring in the bucks I need to make the things I really want happen.
I had a meeting with a publisher in Melbourne just a few days ago, but I had to find out the hard way that my project wasnt what they were looking for, because they were not the kind of company that published the stuff I write.
I would like to make something out of my writing, but I need something to bring in the $$$$ during the here and now.
Yep, the starving artist is still alive and well.
I guess that makes me a bohemian... I've always wanted to live in Fitzroy.
Well... there was nothing in my dark side that really interested me. I guess I just dont have what it takes to be a bad guy.
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Have you tried some specialist publishers, West Wind? Or even better an agent that specialises in placing fantasy / S+S? (I presume that is the genre of your manuscript.) If you got as far as a meeting, they must have thought you had potential at least.
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I haven't found anything like that in Australia, yet. But I'm always looking.
As it turned out, the publishing company I had the meeting with specialised in childrens picture books.
They saw my potential, it was just the wrong company.
(Serves as a warning to do your research before jumping in, eh?)
The project I originally submitted to them was a fantasy piece inspired by Japanese mythology, although if you read it you would be hard pressed to find anything relating to Japanese culture.
The piece I submitted to this thread was a pirce I was working on for a friends birthday, but then I just let it grow and grow.
Last edited by The_West_Wind (04-12-06 02:24:48)
Well... there was nothing in my dark side that really interested me. I guess I just dont have what it takes to be a bad guy.
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First I must apologise for not having read your piece yet, but I am exceptionally slow at getting to stuff like that. I just thought I'd pop in to say I would like to answer your question on why we write, but it's such a complex matter, I really must gather my thoughts a bit more. I want to answer it, and intend to do so soon, but my lawyers tell me to urge you to continue breathing while you wait.
And I will read your piece, just not right now, it's ten past midnight in Sweden.
Let us scatter our clothes to the wind
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By the way, I've been missing the contributions of the estimable Bolero of late -- and somehow i felt his absence ost strongly just here in this thread right now -- as if he should also have wanted to write here.
Kind of like a few months back when I was missing dauphin, and then, happily, he showed up to at least wave and say hi, maybe someone knows where he is -- I know I have been gone for a couple of months, but I've enjoyed stepping in from time to time and he, like you calenture and other wonderful new folks here, often has such interesting things to say.
(i'm sorry that all my posts are asides, but it's gotta be somebody's primary job just to read. . . . ! )
Under all speech that is good for any-thing there lies a silence that is better. Silence is as deep as Eternity; speech is as shallow as Time.--Thomas Carlysle
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Calenture, I've been enjoying all of your contributions to the forum. Like Nowaysis, I've not yet read your piece, but I did read your very enticing introduction, and stopped just as I was about to enter the "...tavern on the mainland." I'll read it when I know I'm in the right head space. I'm glad about the allegory style, because other than technical stuff, allegory seems to be all I read lately. Currently I'm re-reading Thus Spake Zarathustra and a while ago I read Orwell's Animal Farm. As for responding to the "Why write/create" question, again, like Nowaysis, it seems complex to me. I want to respond, but reducing it to something anyone would want to read seems a daunting task, but one I'd like to take on.
--dyslexius
p.
Is the person above the person above me
the same person she was before me?
s.
Last edited by dyslexius (06-12-06 21:34:04)
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I want to respond, but reducing it to something anyone would want to read seems a daunting task, --dyslexius
Daunting task indeed. Like tasting blood after someone has given you a hefty punch in the mouth. Not that I've experienced that for many years, but the fear of outcome is very similar. I lack the sonic boom of cerebral activity which maps out words in print of exquisite contextual accuracy. There are people on this site who create and respond to threads with extraordinary gifts of "kupu" that flow from their brains to their fingertips with an amazing endlessness of rich vibrancy. To be honest some of it is so breathtaking that I have difficulty in understanding it. In fact some of it I don't understand at all. So I give in to familiar waves of inferiority which come washing through me and do nothing. Sorry Siobhan.
Bolero
Problems are a sign of life. The only people without them are in cemetaries - Napoleon Hill
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To be honest some of it is so breathtaking that I have difficulty in understanding it. In fact some of it I don't understand at all.
You're not alone there Bolero. A lot of the posts on this forum are challenging in one way or another to most of us I suppose. That is the fascination of this place.
Why do I write? For the reason that I do anything creatively challenging. To prove to myself (and to someone who has been dead for 40 years) that I can.
Elfman
Honi Soit Qui Mal Y Pense
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