#1 04-12-10 14:34:01

Arcticnick

Member

Registered: 18-11-10

Posts: 34

Website

World's Best Invention

My Wonderful, Electrified Tennis Racket!

It is not far short of 'Tazar' rated but it's designed to combat insects.
It's way over designed!

Usually stuff manufactured in Thailand isn't very good quality but strangely, in a land where 95% of people regularly practice Buddhism, this racket works brilliantly.

I wouldn't normally advocate attempting mass murder (?) of any entire species but on this particular occasion, it is just so much fun I can't believe it could really be wrong. It's one of those things you have to truly understand to fully appreciate!

I live in Thailand, where there are Mosquito's as large as the farmed Prawns. The very greatest thing though, is the tremendous game one can play at dusk, sipping one's G and T on the terrace, 'For the quinine, don't you know, Dwarling.'

Instead of previously dreading the ever fading light, I have now taken to zapping the electric fuck out of anything vaguely afloat. Basically, if it flies, it's mine!

'Crack!' 'KeerJizz!' 'KerZap!' Blue (arc welding style) light! And one dead (and smoking) critter! There's seems to be no end to the supply.

So who needs a ball server?

The most remarkable three things about my racket are the amazing noise, the complete lack of any smell, (I expected burned hair) and probably best of all, no angry policeman knocking on the door.

Oh! And they only cost about £5 but I guess that's a forth thing.

The thing is so brilliant, and it's environmentally friendly too. It is rechargeable!

It's so cheap if you get carried away, like John McEnroe, and break it in half, you can just go out and buy another.

Hey! You should give it a go before you judge me!

Last edited by Arcticnick (04-12-10 14:51:34)

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'If it isn't broken...mess with it 'till it is!'

blissed

Member

From: The bus station of the future

Registered: 17-03-06

Posts: 5,622

Re: World's Best Invention

OMG! your a murderer Ha ha, sounds like a very enjoyable and satisfying hobby We get flies here in England during summer, so I try and let them out the window buddhist style or if they really don't want to go hit them with a folded free newspaper. I don't know if you get free newspapers in Thailand but they do all the things a newspaper should do like fly swatting and protecting the carpet while your decorating and you don't have to either buy or read them they're given out specifically to recycle.

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(Self made tycoon and independant financial advisor to the stars)

Xebeche

Member

Registered: 28-05-09

Posts: 201

Re: World's Best Invention

...your...

you're.

Nuke the bastards.  They're responsible for so many human deaths.

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"I read Shakespeare and the Bible, and I can shoot dice. That's what I call a liberal education" - Tallulah Bankhead

blissed

Member

From: The bus station of the future

Registered: 17-03-06

Posts: 5,622

Re: World's Best Invention

Ha ha

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(Self made tycoon and independant financial advisor to the stars)

artist_kitkat

Member

Registered: 06-08-09

Posts: 109

Re: World's Best Invention

Buddhism in Thailand.  The monks smoke, everyone eats meat, and cruelty to animals is rife.  I will have to track down one of those racquets though - my partner is presently the bait when outside (they leave me alone in favour of him) but sunset would be so much more fun with one of them!  And you say they are well made? I can let the snakes slide by but mossies are harder to ignore. Citronella works for me but my partner just gets eaten, anywhere, anytime, regardless of all preventatives.  Looks like outright murder is the only way!

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I like it.  I like it a lot. I like it a lot and then sometimes not.