What do your orgasms feel like?

KikiCurls · 29-06-18 08:49:35

Hello and a big thank you to everyone who has shared on this site.

I want to ask what your orgasms feel like to you? - if you can find a way to put them into words!
Have you experienced orgasms that are much more subtle or barely perceptible? What did they feel
like and how did you know they were orgasms? Are there times when you knew they were happening (maybe
based on previous experience), but couldn't feel them?

(On the following please keep any comments kind - and spare me the 'oh, but its so easy, how can you not, I'd make you come....'etc )
I am asking because whilst I can feel a lot of sexual pleasure (and ejaculate quite easily) I can't feel my orgasms. I only recently learnt
that on a physical level at least they are happening. But I couldn't tell the difference between pleasure peaks and
orgasm. Before this point I thought that maybe they weren't happening at all. I have been sexually active for
over 20 years and consider myself reasonably sex positive. And yes I have done a lot of self-pleasuring over the years.
I've been on the case for the last 3 years after coming to the conclusion that they weren't just going to happen
of their own accord (as I had always assumed). I've had psychosexual therapy and also been working with a body based
practitioner trained in tantra and sexological bodywork. This is how I now know they are happening, but i'm not feeling them
- which probably means that I've been having them for a long time, but not feeling/recognising them. I am attempting
to change the way I self-pleasure (Orgasmic yoga practice) and listen much more closely to my body - so yeah, all is in hand so to speak.....

There is a lot of narrative out there that you 'just know' when you have an orgasm and that they are obvious and they
make you feel amazing. I'd like to hear about those experiences, but also anything that doesn't fit that narrative too.
My subscription expires in a couple of days, although I expect I will take out another subscription in a while.... so if I don't
respond for a while that's why, but would be really keen to hear of other women's/people with vagina's experiences.
And any tips that may have helped you overcome any similar issues around orgasm are welcome too!

Also, to anyone else struggling with this you are not the only one, even though it can feel like it. Most my friends (now that i've
broken the silence and spoken to most of them) never had problems - apart from one who had an 8 year gap between her first and second
because she didn't like her first experience. And another who hasn't had one in over 20 years due to medications.
I also happened to see a wonderful clowning performance - a woman on a mission dressed as sperm on her quest to experience
orgasm!
This is quite a good website https://www.omgyes.com/

Thank you, KC....

privignus · 29-06-18 20:24:56

Hi KikiCurious,

I am not very eloquent today but I talked about this at http://forum.ifeelmyself.com/forum/view … p?id=18953

One theory which keeps running through my head is that for many people, especially men, sex is not really about pleasure as much as scratching an itch, or demonstrating power, or impressing your friends. I don't remember where I first heard that, maybe Elf Sternberg or Marty Klein https://elfs.livejournal.com/#item1632247, but it is one of those cynical things which might be true and might explain why different people use the word orgasm to mean different things.

PS. Forum membership lasts after site membership ends

Last edited by privignus (29-06-18 21:41:58)

privignus · 29-06-18 22:03:45

Also, I don't feel like I know what the word orgasm means. I am not sure if I have ever had as much fun in bed as some of the contributors here have had (blush). Some of the private time with other people which made me smile the most did not involve ejaculating.

The variety of human experience is a vast ocean, and maybe one day with the right partner I will find my way to the sea that other people talk about.

I don't understand what it would mean to have an orgasm and not feel it, but qualia are hard to communicate I am sorry, I am not very eloquent today.

viva · 02-07-18 21:37:19

hi kiki,
first I want to say thanks for being brave and coming here and speaking up about this - and not only here, but in your personal life. I believe when people express the ways in which their experiences differ from the mainstream norm, we give power to the realm of truth. because the reality is, so many people who experience themselves as deviating from the norm simply don't speak up, and that's the reason the "norm" is perceived as it is. and what we refer to as "normal" is actually just a blend of patriarchal fantasy and experiences expressed by the most confident, verbal and charismatic members of society.

So basically not "normal" or median at all. And trying to conform to that exaggerated normal can distract many of us from the actual wonders of our own experiences.

all that said to thank you, once again.

I can tell you that my first orgasm, with a vibrator at the age of 18, pretty much felt like nothing. I would describe it as a "caught breath" feeling in my clitoris, followed by a "flutter". oh - oh - oh -oh - and then a tiny burst, or maybe even the feeling of a barrier removed, followed by that pulsing flutter.

to this day my first and clitoral orgasms are... really good yeah... but... not enough. I've rarely experienced true sexual satisfaction, there's almost always a feeling of wanting more. I dream of meeting a man who wants to and is able to wear me out.

over time my orgasms have increased in sensation and satisfaction as I've learned to be more "in my body" and less in my head. for me that means removing any mental stimulus - including porn and active fantasising. its so hard not to think about the orgasm or the feeling or chasing the orgasm or the anxiety of chasing the orgasm - but all of those things take away from my pleasure. while distracting mentally from those things (porn or fantasy) also distracts from my pleasure. for me, experiencing pleasure has been about increasing focus and presence.

im super interested in your sexual bodywork and tantric therapist. my orgasms are a thing i my life i also really want to work on and i would LOVE to do it with a professional.

_hyperballad_ · 03-07-18 02:33:54

Morning Kiki,

Thanks for sharing with us, we work with rather vulnerable subject matter here & I think it's very cool when we are able to open up to each other here in the forums. It gives me faith that we're creating a safe space to have real, in depth discussions about pleasure & orgasm.

I was 15 or 16 when I had my first orgasm, at the instruction of a girlfriend I touched my clitoris, it felt very good & I kept doing that til something happened. At the time it felt like a firework had gone off in my body, but I think I was so starved of positive sexual touch that what I now perceive to be a wee little burst of sexual energy totally rocked my world.

For the longest time, including when I first started contributing here I struggled for a second orgasm after that first firework. I didn't even really feel like masturbating a second time after cumming but as long as I didn't wank for a week or so prior I was able to but the 2nd one never felt as good. I was a strictly non penetrative wanker, always on my clitoris & the orgasms were good but not a patch on what I can achieve today. I mostly used my hands & had some toys but I was more interested in partnered sex than anything else.

Somewhere along the line I decided that I wanted to teach myself how to ejaculate which meant trying to orgasm from penetration so I basically trained myself to do that. Which meant that I discovered how good penetration can feel, I explored myself internally & whilst ejaculating proved elusive for quite some time after that it was like a whole new world had opened up to me. I've also found breath work to be a huge component of slowing down the rush to release & also sometimes edging works really well for me too. Sometimes I find I have super sensitivity around my butt too, I have found double penetration to be like a double orgasm, but this only really works if I feel like it.

I also seem to have 'sessions' now, it's not 1 orgasm & then another separate orgasm that's lesser. It's a rolling exploratory, enjoyable wave that crashes & peaks, I do find a lot of the time now my second orgasm is better than my first one. Sometimes my 3rd or 4th are the best ones!

The one thing that has remained constant is that through creating different sexual goals I've made a frame work for exploration that has lead me to better orgasms but also better masturbation practices. I've been working on letting go of orgasm as a goal & if I feel like I'm tensing or pushing to cum then I will just stop. I've found that this has been very difficult but ultimately helpful.

I do find that as I've gotten older & more intentional with what I do, I feel climax or orgasm less in my genitals & more spread throughout my body. Often it feels like I'm splitting in half down the centre of my body, those ones leave me with the most satisfying tears on my face & a feeling of remarkable stillness & calm. I'm inside my head a whole lot so it's a real feat when I can make that happen. Overall orgasm for me is a large burst of pleasure, a spike upwards from climax that originates inside my vagina, pushes out & over my vulva & spreads out over my body. It's a total ego death, I have no idea what is going on, apparently sometimes I shout my head off & literally flail. My partner has told me that when I have especially intense orgasms my whole body bucks up & down off the bed. As I said I have no real awareness of this I am so focused inwards.

That said, sometimes I get horny in my brain & touch myself & can't feel anything. Sometimes I will be with my partner & when we enters me I can't feel it. When this happens I don't proceed, I don't push myself into a sexual encounter that I can't embody properly. This has been kind of a big deal for me to learn because there's this narrative that if we start a sexual encounter we have to follow through. You definitely don't.

It sounds like you are on the path to self discovery & I applaud you seeking professional guidance. I'm not sure if you are the sort of person that is inside your head a lot but in my own personal experience learning how to sink right down deep inside my body & really get lost in sensation has proved invaluable to me in terms of achieving really great orgasms. I go see my psych every 3 or 4 weeks, I go see a body worker every 2-3 & I have lots of different outlets for stress. Your brain is your largest sex organ so I would suggest a holistic approach to any sexual goal.

I'm not sure where you're based but I highly recommend BodySex workshops, I had a profound orgasmic experience when I was in NY about 3 weeks ago with Betty Dodson, there are practitioners all over the globe & I'm planning on becoming accredited so I can facilitate them here in Aus. The website & youtube series has lots of really great practical advise, I'd recommend going & exploring there: dodsonandross.com

I've written you an essay! I hope some of it is helpful to you & again it's kickass that you're actively working on finding & feeling through your orgasm.

Good luck & please check back in & let us know how you're going <3

Last edited by _hyperballad_ (03-07-18 02:37:56)

viva · 03-07-18 02:40:34

dude hyperb that was amazing. learning.

privignus · 03-07-18 21:44:15

Wow viva and _hyperballad_! Thank you! That is amazing.

Its interesting how some women really like penetration. "She comes first!" and "most women need clitoral stimulation to come" are messages which a lot of guys need to hear, but sex is complicated.

viva · 04-07-18 22:23:04

i can't achieve my fullest orgasmic potential without penetration, and I can't achieve orgasm at all without clitoral stimulation.

_hyperballad_ · 06-07-18 03:40:48

Politically I do believe women should be cumming first, simply because if they don't, they won't.

But I know that even hetero sex is in practice much more nuanced than that.

privignus · 06-07-18 18:49:29

viva wrote:

i can't achieve my fullest orgasmic potential without penetration, and I can't achieve orgasm at all without clitoral stimulation.

Thanks viva!

Someone linked to an engadget blogger (warning: tracking, Javascript, autoplay video), who a few posts ago equated ejaculation and orgasm ("According to Eisenberg, sperm concentration is highest when a man refrains from ejaculating for two to five days. I rarely go more than 24 hours without an orgasm, so I was near ready to explode by the time 48 hours had passed.") So I wonder if some guys use orgasm to mean "ejaculating/that scratched-an-itch feeling" while others use it to mean that momentary delerium. It sounds like Kiki's practitioner means something else, if they think you can have an orgasm and not notice it ...

viva · 08-07-18 15:35:01

I agree, I hope Kiki comes back and continues this discussion. I guess what they were saying is that she experiences physiological symptoms of orgasm but does not report experiencing the sensory ones. to me this sounds like a mental block but who knows, sexuality is so so complex and mysterious!

privignus · 15-07-18 21:51:21

I hope so too Viva!

KikiCurious' bodyworker has a background in tantra, and I think they have their own specific understanding of orgasm and types of orgasm, I don't know much about it though!

KikiCurls · 29-07-18 01:36:00

Hello! I'm back! Thank you so much for your responses and sharings. It seems like you can only view, but not reply when you don't have a subscription! I will respond more thoroughly soon.

Viva - if you message me your (approx) location I can ask my bodyworker if she knows of someone. She works a lot internationally, so may well know of someone in Oz - I know she's gone to festivals etc down under.

Thanks again!

viva · 30-07-18 22:10:40

hi Kiki! is it ok if I email you? I can get your info from the forum admin if so xx

KikiCurls · 30-07-18 23:08:22

Hello Viva,

Yes that is fine to email...... I did try to email you before - there seems to be a button for it, but I don't think it got through - maybe because my subscription had expired at that time....
and i am coming back here to say more, just super busy!

_hyperballad_ · 31-07-18 01:13:48

So great you're back KikiCurls, looking forward to an update on how everything is going for you <3

KikiCurls · 31-07-18 22:50:08

viva wrote:

.....
I can tell you that my first orgasm, with a vibrator at the age of 18, pretty much felt like nothing. I would describe it as a "caught breath" feeling in my clitoris, followed by a "flutter". oh - oh - oh -oh - and then a tiny burst, or maybe even the feeling of a barrier removed, followed by that pulsing flutter. ......
.... over time my orgasms have increased in sensation and satisfaction as I've learned to be more "in my body" and less in my head. for me that means removing any mental stimulus - including porn and active fantasising. its so hard not to think about the orgasm or the feeling or chasing the orgasm or the anxiety of chasing the orgasm - but all of those things take away from my pleasure. while distracting mentally from those things (porn or fantasy) also distracts from my pleasure. for me, experiencing pleasure has been about increasing focus and presence.
.

Hi - just want to pick up a few things, but not sure I've quite got quoting cracked!
On the first para - I have now wondered about a time with my first sexual partner whether that was my first orgasm. It was subtle, but it did stop my in my tracks. I was giving her attention, but my clit must have been gently brushing against her leg without me realising - what I remember of it was a sudden increase in sensation & i think there was some kind of whispery sensation that briefly darted upwards from my clit - and I had to stop for a few moments to catch my breath.... which I felt kind of bad about because it disrupted her flow as I stopped my touch.

On the second point - yes I think I'm at a point where i'm just trying to really deeply listen to my body, be present. Sometimes I use fantasy sometimes I don't. That was the biggest difference between my therapist and the bodyworker. I've never been a big fantasiser - I think partly a ready made story is boring to me (I don't want to know exactly what's going to happen next - so if its my own brain divising it, I already know as I tell it to myself/imagine it). Anyway so my therapist was like the brain is really important and always wanting to get me to fantasise more! (Also to stop other thought distractions - which isn't a massive problem, but can happen). Then the bodyworker was like fantasy can take you away from being present from your body don't fantasise (for a while at least!)..... and not fantasising helps you have a direct connection with your body without the need for outside stimulation. I think your word focus is key though.... fantasy isn't the only way to engage the brain, but if you don't focus then you can get distracted or not notice what is happening. Mostly I either fantasise to get myself in the mood - or spontaneous fantasy gets me in the mood...... or else I tend to use fragmants of scenarios, images, a critical point in a sexual encounter when I'm at a fairly high level of arousal, to increase it & pleasure further.

.... also on the chasing - whether that's pleasure or orgasm. This is something I'm trying to get my head round - figure out whether I'm chasing, or whether I'm just following or staying with. I'm finding it hard to discern the difference. I don't think I've ever really chased with sexual partners as I've just been enjoying whatever the experience brings. With self-pleasuring its harder to tell. Maybe sometimes I've been pushing for more from my body..... and I think I've probably been kidding myself quite a lot of times thinking I'm not trying to have an orgasm (when maybe secretly I have been trying/hoping - so many times when i've felt as though i'm really close) Now I'm trying not to be goal orientated although at the same time that feels contradictory because my intention is as well as feeling more sexual pleasure is that I want to feel an orgasm.

Last edited by KikiCurls (31-07-18 22:59:38)

KikiCurls · 31-07-18 23:46:36

Hello Hyperballad - thank you for all your descriptions of your different experiences of orgasm..... I guess they are the sorts of things that I think I would be feeling - if I was feeling orgasm. Some descriptions friends have given me include fireworks, waves (of contractions), rushes. My sister said she thought the best feeling/sensation was just before coming, but then the coming was what felt satisfying and releasing - and if that bit didn't happen she would feel frustrated/incomplete.

I'll pick up on a few things quoted below....

_hyperballad_ wrote:

Somewhere along the line I decided that I wanted to teach myself how to ejaculate which meant trying to orgasm from penetration so I basically trained myself to do that. Which meant that I discovered how good penetration can feel, I explored myself internally & whilst ejaculating proved elusive for quite some time after that it was like a whole new world had opened up to me. I've also found breath work to be a huge component of slowing down the rush to release & also sometimes edging works really well for me too. Sometimes I find I have super sensitivity around my butt too, I have found double penetration to be like a double orgasm, but this only really works if I feel like it.
........
The one thing that has remained constant is that through creating different sexual goals I've made a frame work for exploration that has lead me to better orgasms but also better masturbation practices. I've been working on letting go of orgasm as a goal & if I feel like I'm tensing or pushing to cum then I will just stop. I've found that this has been very difficult but ultimately helpful.
..........
It sounds like you are on the path to self discovery & I applaud you seeking professional guidance. I'm not sure if you are the sort of person that is inside your head a lot but in my own personal experience learning how to sink right down deep inside my body & really get lost in sensation has proved invaluable to me in terms of achieving really great orgasms. I go see my psych every 3 or 4 weeks, I go see a body worker every 2-3 & I have lots of different outlets for stress. Your brain is your largest sex organ so I would suggest a holistic approach to any sexual goal.
I'm not sure where you're based but I highly recommend BodySex workshops, I had a profound orgasmic experience when I was in NY about 3 weeks ago with Betty Dodson, there are practitioners all over the globe & I'm planning on becoming accredited so I can facilitate them here in Aus. The website & youtube series has lots of really great practical advise, I'd recommend going & exploring there: dodsonandross.com

The wierd thing is that I can ejaculate really easily (so if the not feeling/having orgasms is to do with being able to let go - I seem to easily let go in other ways) - the first time it happened I wasn't even aware I had. (I may well have been having my second experiences of orgasm with that partner - she was VERY good with her hands and I had highly pleasurable sex with her!.... and I remember at least once her saying to me 'are you sure you're not having an orgasm, because you feel like you are - she could feel contractions etc.) Sometimes I ejaculate quite a lot, other times just a little, sometimes not at all. I am aware now of when I do - and also recognise the signs of it about to happen. I've even experienced it once without any touch stimulation!

I'm definitely consciously breathing more than I used to - I find slower deep breaths work for me best if doing them deliberately (attempting fast breaths to increase arousal just backfires for me and feels fake).... and otherwise just going more with fast breaths when they naturally come about - being more conscious about making/allowing noise too - the bodyworker says throat/voice and genitals are a strong connection. I've found I love stroking and scratching my throat.

On the letting go of goals - and stopping when you tense or push - do you mean you stop completely - or just for a moment? I have noticed that quite often I will tense in my upper belly when I feel a surge of strong sensation. I am wondering if this is what lots of people do/if its a potential problem. I've seen from videos here and on BA that some people will get really tense - and still come (so obviously not a problem for some people) - and others will stay very relaxed all/almost all the way through.

I'm picking up on the phrase sinking deep into your body...... I think my bodyworker has used the phrase dropping into the body which is something I've found useful.... on the one hand i feel as though I am in my body a lot - but to go deeper is maybe what i need. (I've done a lot of dancing in my life, so in other spheres have felt i'm very body aware/in my body - but maybe that's a different way of being in body - and if a technique a lot of it is about getting your body to move a particular way rather than just being in the moment with your body).

I'm not in US or Aus, but someone I know has done a Betty Dodson workshop -sounds quite hilarious at times! I accidentally ended up on her website the other day actually - I think I was googling subtle orgasms or something! I will have more of a look around her website as seems to be quite a lot on there....

KikiCurls · 01-08-18 00:11:50

Ok, last post of the eve then I need to sleep!

So yes my bodyworker told me at a physiological level I was having an orgasm. The first time she told me was about 10mins after it happened (she didn't want to startle me/disrupt my flow - and I guess was waiting to see if I said I'd noticed anything). All I was aware of was that I was experiencing a high amount of sexual pleasure - fluctuating up and down a bit - and that point must have been on an up point.
The things she noticed were - involuntary contractions (I was really surprised how strong and definite they were when she later demonstrated what they had felt like by squeezing my hand.... I felt nothing in terms of recognisable muscle contractions - never do)
She also felt twitchiness around my clit. (that perhaps may give people that fireworks feeling) She also noticed the change in my breathing pattern that often happens when people come and that I flexed/moved my body through my back. I can't remember now if there were other things - but I guess she has seen a lot of orgasms in her time and so has a good sense of them. The flexing my body was the only thing I was aware of.

So I know that people feel orgasms in different ways - and I'm beginning to realise that maybe some are quite subtle..... but I have probably always thought that one or more of the following are common in all women's experience of orgasm. I wonder if these are true or assumptions/things i've been led to believe.... what do you think?
1) that orgasms feel amazing
2) that you 'just know' when you've had one (I seem to be proving that one wrong!)
3) that there is some sense of release/relaxation/completion when you've had one
4) that you feel something in your clit and/or vagina that feels extra intense which may stay quite localised to pelvis area - or may move through your body. And that feeling will feel like one or more of the following - like fireworks (subtle or strong), like waves, like some kind of wooshing/rushing feeling/sensation

_hyperballad_ · 01-08-18 01:28:18

Yessssssss. All about the breath. It is a thing that I will always do. Not just with orgasm, arousal either, breath & controlling my breath, breathing exercises has improved my mental & emotional well being 10 fold.

Sometimes I stop completely, turn off my vibe or take my hands off my genitals & do something else, go to sleep etc. Other times I stop for a bit, do a bit of deep, slow breathing & then resume. If I had more self control I'd stop completely every time, because when I do touch myself the next time, a day or 2 or 3 later it is phenomenal, a very VERY intense orgasm.

I don't think I even grasped what sinking into my body actually meant til I was in my 30's. I live in my head a whole lot, I definitely used to be prove to hyperactivity, less so these days, but I really had to work at this thing. For me it isn't about bodily awareness, it's about fully & wholly connecting with my physicality & the energy moving through my body. Shutting off the racket in my head. Purely feeling my way through sensation. It sounds really esoteric but it's quite a specific thing, I'm maybe not using the right words, but I visualise literally sinking down into myself through my chest usually.

There are BodySex practicioners all over the globe! Have a look on the site if you're interested. It definitely was a very funny experience at times. Highly recommend their YouTube series & there is a huge amount of info on the site, I learnt lots of different things in my 20's from there. I've also found Betty's vaginal barbell to be a great orgasmic tool.

Regarding your last post:

1) orgasms don't always feel amazing for me - but this is I think the line that we're usually fed
2) for me I knew, it was a distinctive climax & O. These days sometimes when I come it's ambiguous, I think I did but I don't know, it feels like I've had a physiological response but no really feeling of an orgasm. These happen more frequently just after I've stopped bleeding in my cycle.
3) not always & sometimes not at all. Sometimes I have an orgasm & it's a definite warm up O. Last night I masturbated in the hopes of it putting me to sleep. It didn't & I actually felt kind of annoyed & unsatisfied afterwards.
4) my orgasms generally originate in my vulva. From my understanding of the full anatomy of erectile tissue related to the clitoris (as well as the bulbs) it is believed to also extend to the inside of the vagina - thus the G spot & all of this erectile tissue is where I think I experience the most concentrated sensation.

I hope some of this stuff is helping, I really do. I am rooting for you to navigate your way through this & find that sensation that your body is producing but you're not quite feeling <3

viva · 01-08-18 22:35:11

Kiki your posts are so cool and really have me thinking and feeling. It's interesting what you say about "chasing the orgasm". It's like, of course I am masturbating to orgasm - I wouldn't masturbate otherwise, except for when I was younger and didn't know what was what, I would touch but mostly I would just do cybersex with older guys for hours and hours and hours every night. it was so not in my body, and there was no orgasm involved, but that was my early exploratory sexual experience.

but yeah it's like of course i'm wanting the orgasm, but being in my body is about just not thinking. following the natural desire of the body instead of some imposed idea - it's not about not getting hotter and wanting more, it's about not being anxious.

i think you can have really yummy orgasms from tensing up but for me, my goal is the ones you get when you let go into it. it sounds like that's what you do when you squirt, so maybe you're really opposite of me, so good at letting go, and maybe not as good as being hyper present. I've been trying to learn an outward, pushing orgasm... maybe you need like a tensing, pulling in?

why do you masturbate?

KikiCurls · 14-08-18 12:52:11

....just want to say thanks to Ruvada - for her orgasm description on her recent video!! (Not sure if she'll see this, but just putting it out there!) Does anyone know if there are other videos where women describe what it feels like to them?

Frances · 15-08-18 02:24:43

It's is a lovely ending to that video. I especially like the care she takes in explaining the reasoning behind the technique that she uses. This topic is often covered in video profiles of the artists - I think after watching this thread for a while Jesse G would be a really good profile to start with.

KikiCurls · 10-09-18 23:18:53

Hello! I'm back! Thanks for the tip Frances - yup Jesse gives really interesting detail on her ways of doing things. (Any more video tips welcome!) I guess all of that is what I'm doing more of. I've also had some quite strong sexual energetic experiences within the last month or two. Actually getting to quite a high level of pleasure with no/minimal touch on occasion. I also had a conversation with someone recently who said she used to think she wasn't having orgasms and at some point realised she was dismissing the subtle sensations she was experiencing - once she started giving attention to those subtle orgasms and really noticing what more she could feel, they started to get stronger/feel more. So I'm going to start doing this more, and saying to myself that I just had an orgasm at what feels like climax moments - notice what I feel....see if i can feel/notice more. (Some might be orgasms/some might not - but it doesn't really matter)

Viva - lots of different reasons I masturbate/self pleasure. Often because I'm feeling sexual/horny and want an expression/outlet for that. Sometimes as a conscious choice to 'practice'. Sometimes because I can't sleep and sometimes it helps. Sometimes procrastination/avoiding something I 'should' be doing. Sometimes as relief from having had to do something really boring for hours. Because people say its good for you and because I usually enjoy it. (Although sometimes if I'm doing it for practice alone I get bored/distracted.) Also to complete a sexual encounter with a partner when they are finished and I still have a way to go!
I will have to think more on the hyper present vs letting go - but interesting.... people often say/assume its all about letting go /surrender. How would you define/picture letting go or surrender... what does it feel like in your body? I only caught a sense of what surrender felt like within my own body over the past year or so - I couldn't grasp what it meant before then.

_hyperballad_ · 19-09-18 07:26:26

Thanks so much for checking back in with us, I don't know how I missed your response!

The high levels of pleasure with no/minimal touch sounds amazing, makes me want to explore energetic stuff much, much more.

Glad to hear that you are making progress & focusing on the sensations you can feel sounds like a really good idea.

Surrender for me feels like an incredibly deep relaxing of things I didn't even know I was 'tensing'... Metaphorically though because it's not a physical thing it's an inner space thing. I am consciously entering myself & letting down my guard, releasing the stranglehold I often have on myself, especially my emotions. I work so damn hard to keep my emotional stuff in check, incredibly so when I'm moving through the world so there is definitely a large emotionally freeing component of surrender. Accepting that whatever is going to happen is going to happen & I am going to feel what I am going to feel.

I hope this is helpful <3

#1 29-06-18 08:49:35

What do your orgasms feel like?

#2 29-06-18 20:24:56

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#3 29-06-18 22:03:45

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#4 02-07-18 21:37:19

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#5 03-07-18 02:33:54

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#6 03-07-18 02:40:34

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#7 03-07-18 21:44:15

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#8 04-07-18 22:23:04

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#9 06-07-18 03:40:48

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#10 06-07-18 18:49:29

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#11 08-07-18 15:35:01

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#12 15-07-18 21:51:21

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#13 29-07-18 01:36:00

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#14 30-07-18 22:10:40

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#15 30-07-18 23:08:22

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#16 31-07-18 01:13:48

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#17 31-07-18 22:50:08

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#18 31-07-18 23:46:36

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#19 01-08-18 00:11:50

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#20 01-08-18 01:28:18

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#21 01-08-18 22:35:11

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#22 14-08-18 12:52:11

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#23 15-08-18 02:24:43

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#24 10-09-18 23:18:53

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

#25 19-09-18 07:26:26

Re: What do your orgasms feel like?

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